Happiness

Joy.  Sorrow.  Happiness.  Sadness. 

I have no doubt if I asked, “Would you rather experience growth through happiness or sadness?” 99% of you would say, without hesitation, “Happiness of course!”

Be assured I would say the same thing.

What if I changed the question and asked, “When do you experience the greatest growth, during happy or sad times?”  Not sure what the percentage would be but bet we are the same here too.  I have consistently experienced the greatest growth during times of great sorrow or sadness.

The times when all is well and I am “happy,” I tend to move through my days with ease.  I do what I need to do, some of what I don’t need or want to do and really enjoy doing, being and playing.  Living life…probably pretty selfishly.

During times when things are jacked up, messed up and chaotic; when things are treacherous and scary;  when people, things, or events wreak havoc on my life; when I find myself wallowing in a pit of despair and darkness; when I can’t get away from my thinking and the internal monologue keeps rolling; when true sorrow saps my energy and when sadness swallows my hope…I tend to want to hide, to run away and maybe even pretend that all is just fine and go back to old ways of thinking, being and doing.

But, I won’t.  I can’t.  I have come too far.  I know through sadness or sorrow (whichever you want to call it) there is an opportunity.  I can allow the circumstances to change me, grow me and teach me.  I can remind myself that the sadness will be momentary and that I will come out on the other side and experience the happiness I want most…just like times in my past.  The circumstance or thing may be different, but God is still the same.  He wants me to be better not bitter.  He wants me to fight through it…again!

I realize that during these times of sorrow and sadness, I slow down.  And honestly, it’s not a choice I make, “it” makes the choice for me…whatever “it” is.  All of the sudden, nothing else matters.  It becomes my focus.  It makes me move intentionally.  It makes me speak cautiously.  It makes me reflect internally.  It makes me want happiness.  It compels me to search.  It drives me to dig deep.  It creates a fire in my soul to fight for what I know is to be, should be or could be!

When I meet sorrow, I am immediately aware of me and my inability to understand so much.  Sorrow cuts to the depths of my soul. Experiencing deep sadness is part of my life. I’m sure yours too.  It’s a process that I want to avoid at all costs, but am learning that will never be possible.  You see, Christ suffered and since I am created in His image, I will suffer and so will you.

Today, I am not in the hopeless pit of despair.  I am coming out of it.  My hope has been revived and my soul has been renewed.  I believe that the sorrow and sadness I experience are times when God refines me…molds me to be more like He needs me to be.  I sure wish he would pick the “happiness path” to refine me, it’s definitely more fun and enjoyable!  But, I know that is not the plan for the transformation He hopes see.

So, I will choose to thank Him for the really hard days.  The days that caused me to be sad, hopeless, desperate and empty.  The days I had dig deep, be real and take risk.   What I know is those days, stretched, pushed and changed me.  This recent trek, with God and others, has helped me get to a joy-filled place today.  I see beauty, grace, love, forgiveness and faithfulness.  I see growth!  I see that sorrow doesn’t have to forever derail me.  I see that sorrow and sadness can supernaturally propel me.  Today, I will see and embrace the joy!

Questions:  What’s your story on joy and sorrow? How have you seen it derail you? What’s standing in the way of taking steps to allowing it to propel you?  

Share your comments and thoughts.  As always, I would love to hear from you!

“Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.”  author unknown